2009 already?

It’s always about the time
When I give you my very best,
You take it but let it go the very next second,
Like you don’t even care how I feel.

I learnt to shut my mouth and not ask why,
Explanations can only lead to more lies.
I know to love you means I have to cope.
The question is how long before my head explores.

One-sided relationships, I have enough.
Most of the time, I was alone by myself.
You played me round and round,
Like a clown to always make you smile.

Now, it’s only fair for me to get what I want.
Without losing the self-respect I barely left,
I will fake it like I’m happy with your decision
rather than to beg for your forgiveness.

Ready To Commit

Today, again, we didn’t chat.
I thought that’s it, you don’t want me back.
I have no reason to ask you to forget,
Or to forgive the mistake I have made.

I promised to wait.
Afterall, it’s my decision; I got no one to blame.
Till I find another smile on your face,
Tomorrow is gonna be another long, long day.

Because I still never stop thinking about you.
Because you never fail to remind me you're the victim and I’m the culprit.
Because it’s exhausting to bring you back to the beginning when we met.
Because I made a foolish choice, I got to live with that.

That time I ran away cos I’m not ready.
Now I will wait for you to be ready.

Emptiness

It’s creepy
It’s silence
It’s helpless.
It’s frustrating.
It’s devastating.
It’s coming over me.
It’s haunting me bit by bit.

I need a job. Period.